Guest Guest63690 Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 (edited) Hi all, I have just read a very moving post by a young woman who moved to oz when she was nine and was then afflicted with acute delayed homesickness in her mid teens. She expressed in a very clear and moving way, how isolated this homesickness made her feel. She also said she appreciated that her parents moved to oz to give her a better life and she felt it would be ungrateful of her to 'winge' about her feelings. Her post had me in tears, and it got me thinking. How many parents discuss the subject of homesickness with their children before the big move and while they are over in OZ, and if they did, how did they tackle it. And how did they respond if their children were unhappy? Thanks Edited July 16, 2012 by Guest63690 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest JK2510 Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I think people with hormonal teenage children should tread very carefully when moving to oz....in the last few weeks I have discovered some shocking events in our house some of it due to the move here even though my kids have always been happy about the move. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest AKA63029 Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 A lot depends on their age I guess. When we go back we are fortunate that the youngest (17) who is coming with us understands what it will entail. She is old enough to realise that the move will be a huge step in her life and she will indeed miss her 'life' back here. But she is resilient and mindful that it IS huge step, and we have done our best to reinforce not only the positives but the negatives also, so hopefully she has a balanced mindset about it. If they were younger, maybe in early teens I think it could be a different story. All you can do is chat and discuss ALL possibilities, then hopefully nothing will come as a shock (well not too much anyway). It's about being open and honest with them if at all possible (again depends on age and what they can 'understand') but it's no good IMO going and pretending everything will be plain sailing, there are always going to be a few hiccups on the way and in the early stages, just the way it is I guess. Cheers Tony. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freckleface Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I think this is something families all over the world have to deal with regardless of whether they are moving from one country to another or from one end of a country to another. We moved a lot while our kids were growing up and there were lots of emotions at different times. At the end of the day we always maintained a household that encouraged them to talk about problems, things they weren't happy about as well as the good things. If your kids feel comfortable talking to you they will open up about anything - at least that was our experience with our kids. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest AKA63029 Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I think this is something families all over the world have to deal with regardless of whether they are moving from one country to another or from one end of a country to another. We moved a lot while our kids were growing up and there were lots of emotions at different times. At the end of the day we always maintained a household that encouraged them to talk about problems, things they weren't happy about as well as the good things. If your kids feel comfortable talking to you they will open up about anything - at least that was our experience with our kids. Completely agree Freckles, but. Dads worst nightmare: 'Dad, you know I've been seeing so and so for a long time, well, err, what do you think.................',:shocked::cry: It was 'openly' discussed, but had to hide my 'Little Girl Is No Longer A Little Girl' emotion.:cry: I should also add this is concerning my ELDEST daughter thank God.:biglaugh: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Freckleface Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 Completely agree Freckles, but. Dads worst nightmare: 'Dad, you know I've been seeing so and so for a long time, well, err, what do you think.................',:shocked::cry: It was 'openly' discussed, but had to hide my 'Little Girl Is No Longer A Little Girl' emotion.:cry: I should also add this is concerning my ELDEST daughter thank God.:biglaugh: Ah yes - happened to us as well. Really hard to have a rational conversation when you are going - :arghh: NO - on the inside. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Ropey HOFF Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I think if she moved when she was 9 years old, she wouldn't have much of a connection left to the UK or know much about life there, I think it is a case of the mind playing tricks with her, like a long distant lost love, a feeling of emptiness for something she perceives to be great from when she was a child, it might have been great, but it is a childhood memory. We haven't discussed it with my daughter, she doesn't want to go she is 14 and might end up like the girl you mentioned, my son is 17 amd I have discussed it with him, at first he didn't want to go, but the older he gets, he is discovering what's going on around him and he says Australia is looking a lot more appealing to him which is good news. I think it's different for everyone, in say a family of four, each will want to go to Australia at different levels, some might not want to go at all, parents have to make tough decisions and sometimes they have to make kids go there when they don't want to and this scenario will be quite common. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imo2oz Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I am also worrying about my two older kids, aged 11 and 12. When we had our family discussion a few months ago, about going to Oz, they both were happy to give it a go. Unfortunately they have both now gone off the boil, and neither of them want to come. They say they are happy here and don't want to leave their friends. This is very annoying, as I so wanted to have them excited and into it before we make this huge leap. However, we have now spent quite a bit of money on getting to Oz, and as soon as the house is sold (fingers crossed!) we will be off, as we already have PR. The thing is, should we acknowledge their feelings but carry on with the big plan anyway, or should we reconsider? I am concerned that they decide they do in fact want to go in a few years time, and then it will be too late as the PR runs out in July 2013. But will forcing them to go be damaging?? I can't even begin to discuss possible feelings of homesickness with them at the moment as they don't want to go anyway. Kids eh. can be such hard work...! Imogen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Ropey HOFF Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 Who knows? We can't predict the future, in a few months they might want to go again, that's kids for you and that's why as adults we make the decisions for them, it's not easy but we can only do what we think is right, best of luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunshine111 Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 (edited) Hi all, I have just read a very moving post by a young woman who moved to oz when she was nine and was then afflicted with acute delayed homesickness in her mid teens. She expressed in a very clear and moving way, how isolated this homesickness made her feel. She also said she appreciated that her parents moved to oz to give her a better life and she felt it would be ungrateful of her to 'winge' about her feelings. Her post had me in tears, and it got me thinking. How many parents discuss the subject of homesickness with their children before the big move and while they are over in OZ, and if they did, how did they tackle it. And how did they respond if their children were unhappy? Thanks It's this whole "better life" thing that needs to be quantified. Before you emmigrate with kids, you have to be sure what it is that you are hoping to improve & know where & how you are going to get that. Moving to Oz doesnt automatically mean your kids will have a better life. We had both our children there & returned to the UK last year because we felt the UK had more to offer them. Talked with our son about the move back home before we went (his whole 5 yrs where in oz) he seemed to understand as best a 5 yr old can but then we upsold it too him, with the benefits of returning & to be honest. I am not sure I would have wanted to return with tweenies or teens because they tend to have built friendships then & probably more stressful. Have monitored our eldest son along the way, especially in this first year but to be honest he settled so quickly here, only took a couple of months. Tho' I'll be honest & say if he had not settled back here in the UK we would have returned to Oz. For the most part we have returned to the UK for the kids. Could luck, do your research. Find out exactly if/how your kids will benefit. Leave no stone unturned so to speak. It's a big move. Edited July 16, 2012 by Sunshine111 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest SkyePom Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 Interesting thread. We are in the process of planning a move to Sydney in Jan 2013 with our 2 sons (11 & 13) and dog. Lots to absorb. Our eldest son is really struggling with the idea and won't talk about it. It's very upsetting. We are only planning a move of 2-4 years before returning to the UK, but even this is a huge step. None of us have been to Australia and the only reason we've decided to go is because of a good job offer. We are encouraging the boys to view it as a life experience and an adventure, not a permanent move. They have so many fears regarding changing schools, new friendships etc. all of which we sympathise with. Really hope we're making a good decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
imo2oz Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 It's this whole "better life" thing that needs to be quantified. Before you emmigrate with kids, you have to be sure what it is that you are hoping to improve & know where & how you are going to get that. Moving to Oz doesnt automatically mean your kids will have a better life. We had both our children there & returned to the UK last year because we felt the UK had more to offer them. Talked with our son about the move back home before we went (his whole 5 yrs where in oz) he seemed to understand as best a 5 yr old can but then we upsold it too him, with the benefits of returning & to be honest. I am not sure I would have wanted to return with tweenies or teens because they tend to have built friendships then & probably more stressful. Have monitored our eldest son along the way, especially in this first year but to be honest he settled so quickly here, only took a couple of months. Tho' I'll be honest & say if he had not settled back here in the UK we would have returned to Oz. For the most part we have returned to the UK for the kids. Could luck, do your research. Find out exactly if/how your kids will benefit. Leave no stone unturned so to speak. It's a big move. That is really interesting. Would you mind me asking why the UK is better for your kids? Not criticising you at all, just wondered, as it all helps with our reverse decision! I expect location in either country is important as well as finances available for all the fun stuff? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest acristinahoran Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I am also worrying about my two older kids, aged 11 and 12. When we had our family discussion a few months ago, about going to Oz, they both were happy to give it a go. Unfortunately they have both now gone off the boil, and neither of them want to come. They say they are happy here and don't want to leave their friends. This is very annoying, as I so wanted to have them excited and into it before we make this huge leap. However, we have now spent quite a bit of money on getting to Oz, and as soon as the house is sold (fingers crossed!) we will be off, as we already have PR. The thing is, should we acknowledge their feelings but carry on with the big plan anyway, or should we reconsider? I am concerned that they decide they do in fact want to go in a few years time, and then it will be too late as the PR runs out in July 2013. But will forcing them to go be damaging?? I can't even begin to discuss possible feelings of homesickness with them at the moment as they don't want to go anyway. Kids eh. can be such hard work...! Imogen Imogen: Kids are hard work, but you should really put all your time into making sure they want to go soon. Sometimes, kids have to realize that what's done is done. You said they were happy to go in the beginning, what made them happy? What you need to do is tailor the great parts of Oz to your kid's hobbies/personalities. This is hard, but you CAN do it. If one of them is obsessive about wildlife, you're in luck, because there is a helluvagood lot of wildlife. But if one of them likes surfing, your sort of screwed, because surfing currently isn't an option in most places unless you're really high end. See what I mean? Now, if you absolutely need to, bend the truth a little. Once you have them so hyped up to go, start very very slowly introducing the cons. Slowly being the key word here, veeeery slowly. I know it doesn't sound like it'll work, but trust me, it will. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quoll Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 I would hope that no parent would ever ever put their kid in the position of the girl mentioned in the OP - the "we came to Australia for your future" line. That's a whole guilt trip in itself, that poor girl knowing that she feels she is in the wrong place but too guilty to move because of the sacrifice her parents made for her. Parents should own the move for what it is - an adult itch for adventure or an opportunity not to be missed not dump it on the kids for future reference to keep them in line. I hope the young lady in question feels able to make her own decisions about where her future lies and is strong enough to achieve what she wants. My kids werent old enough to discuss homesickness when we initially moved to Aus but we had a couple of potential moves at one time - it was presented as "Daddy has a good opportunity and we might be going to XYZ". They wouldnt have had the choice TBH. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SarahRob198 Posted July 16, 2012 Share Posted July 16, 2012 Reading all these posts makes me think, i'm so glad that the chance has come for us to move now while our son is only 3 going on 4, he has not got much of a say in the matter and to be honest we have told him and explained in as much detail as we can, he knows he will be leaving his current school to move to a whole new country (but as long as all his toys go) that's how he thinks and that's all that matters to him really, no issue of leaving friends behind, no relationship issues and infact he gets to see his Nanny and Grandad wh ohe only sees on webcam at the moment. I really fell for all you guys as my parents made the BIG move to Aus in 2008 having planned it since 2004, i have PR status and went on holiday with my parents and bros to validate the visas, it wasn't until a few months before they were due to fly i fell in love with my current partner to which we have now got our son together and are making this big move ourselves, but i decided i didn't want to go and so i stayed here. Anyway I hope all goes well and everything turns out well in the end for you all, all the best. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunshine111 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 That is really interesting. Would you mind me asking why the UK is better for your kids? Not criticising you at all, just wondered, as it all helps with our reverse decision! I expect location in either country is important as well as finances available for all the fun stuff? Like any country it is important to find & be in an area that you want to be. We did alot of research before we returned from Oz & hvae not moved back to our home town but rather found an area that is semi rural & village setting. We are probably different from alot of people in that we had a fantastic 10 yr adventure. Hubby & I backpacked in 1999 for a year came back to UK didnt settle emmigrated to Nz & Oz & generally moved every couple of years, so is safe to say we got the travel bug out of our system now!! Last year we reached a cross roads. After 6 yrs, felt Perth wasnt for us as a family for the long term (lots of reasons) & would have considered a move to Sydney but only based on our experience 10 yrs ago (so much changed since then especially the cost of living) In fairness to Perth, we decided to move there from Nz as a couple (didnt have the kids then) had friends moving there & liked the thought of the blue skies & sunshine! A couple of months of arriving I fell pregnant. We never really had a plan & quite liked moving around but once the kids came we reached a point in our lives where we had to make a decision on a place long term... So we decided to return home, weather was a reason, early childhood system (better here in the UK, I know having had a comparision, tho' more expensive better quality) access to extended family (my 6 yr old has just had a party with Nanny & Grandad & Auntys & uncles attending & all his school mates, he was made up!!) lots more things to do/variety. Grass to play on(sad as that sounds!) I could go on..... (but this is all specific to us as a family, everyone is different) There are plenty of fun things to do in this country for free!!! We went to legoland a couple of months ago on our tescoes vouchers, so didnt cost a penny! there are plenty of deals out there for those parks. Also went caravanning with the sun deal, 9.50 per person couldnt afford to go away in Perth. Loads of events/festivals on. I lurve the fact that you can go across counties for things to do. There is a rockpooling event on in the summer holidays (is free!) All local museums have stuff on in school hols as do the libraries. You have to get out there & find things that suit your kids. The local town centre has free events on for toddlers, as does the local village hall. Honestly, when you start pulling back the layers you realise what is available out there.... There's loads of free trials for kids activities. My son has a free football trial. Kids travel for free on the underground in London. This is all the tip of the iceberg. For the whole of August the West End is offering kids going for free with a paying adult for any show!! For us tho' it took going away to appreciate what the country actually has to offer! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 Moved this from MBTTUK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 Our son is 4, and will be 5 when we move. TBH he is too young to really comprehend 'homesickness' so no, we've not. However we do talk about moving there, his family already living there and those who will be staying here and that we'll see them for holidays and so on. Same with friends. At his young age friendships are far more fluid and generally quickly formed at a new school so I'm not going to over analyse it for him or myself. I know how it goes, I've lived overseas for long periods of time and generally have never been homesick. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Shell15 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 As our move gets closer it is on my mind more and more, more so for the 18 (nearly 19) year old. He was not going to come to start with but after a week reccie has changed his mind and well up for it. I have started talking about it alot more lately although I worry if I talk about it to much it may put him of coming all together. His friends have all said they will come and visit so he holds that thought and I think is what helps him with the move. It will be easier for our 14 year old as she has school, although excited to move is sad to leave her friends. Yesterday I had a bad day and if anyone of them had of said 'i dont want to go' I could have been talked out of it! I feel it's all on my head as it's me who has said I want to go home. Just hope it all works out for the best..friends for the kids and them settling. For my oh and I its a no brainer!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 (edited) I am also worrying about my two older kids, aged 11 and 12. When we had our family discussion a few months ago, about going to Oz, they both were happy to give it a go. Unfortunately they have both now gone off the boil, and neither of them want to come. They say they are happy here and don't want to leave their friends. This is very annoying, as I so wanted to have them excited and into it before we make this huge leap. However, we have now spent quite a bit of money on getting to Oz, and as soon as the house is sold (fingers crossed!) we will be off, as we already have PR. The thing is, should we acknowledge their feelings but carry on with the big plan anyway, or should we reconsider? I am concerned that they decide they do in fact want to go in a few years time, and then it will be too late as the PR runs out in July 2013. But will forcing them to go be damaging?? I can't even begin to discuss possible feelings of homesickness with them at the moment as they don't want to go anyway. Kids eh. can be such hard work...! Imogen I was 13, sister 11, and a younger brother. We just did as we were told and got on the plane. Wasn't happy, none of us were, but 45 years later still here and couldn't be happier. Parents these days seem to have forgotten what being a parent means, and that's making the hard decisions Edited July 17, 2012 by snifter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest63690 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 "I would hope that no parent would ever ever put their kid in the position of the girl mentioned in the OP - the "we came to Australia for your future" line. That's a whole guilt trip in itself, that poor girl knowing that she feels she is in the wrong place but too guilty to move because of the sacrifice her parents made for her. Parents should own the move for what it is - an adult itch for adventure or an opportunity not to be missed not dump it on the kids for future reference to keep them in line. I hope the young lady in question feels able to make her own decisions about where her future lies and is strong enough to achieve what she wants. My kids werent old enough to discuss homesickness when we initially moved to Aus but we had a couple of potential moves at one time - it was presented as "Daddy has a good opportunity and we might be going to XYZ". They wouldnt have had the choice TBH." posted by Ouoll Quoll, I think when you talk about parents owning the decision, you hit on a key point, with regard to freeing a child to speak their mind and express homesickness. If a parent says, "we are making this huge leap to give you a better life!" and then later on that child feels unhappy, like the girl in the post I mentioned, a child may feel guilty for expressing unhappiness. My concern after reading some of the posts, is that the parents get so excited about the prospect of emigration, the child then picks up on this and feels bad for expressing their feelings of trepidation, or after the move, grief at all they have lost. The same goes for when children are excited about some aspects of moving, but do not feel they can express that to family members who are unhappy about them going. When children repress their feelings, they can be seriously affected in the future. Some may get into drugs to numb the feelings they feel bad for having, and some may develop eating disorders, in an attempt to control at least one aspect of their lives. I know this sounds very negative, and I am sure most parents negotiate the challenge of emigration in a healthy way, allowing their childrens feelings, good and bad. I just worry for the kids who cannot express themselves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fairystar32 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 (edited) Our older children were 14, 12 and 9 when we moved. (youngest was a baby) We sat down as a family and discussed moving. We discussed it meant leaving family and freinds behind and we would come back as much as we could too visit. We asked them many times on the few months we had too move and we were all in agreement, I even asked my eldest in the taxi on the way to the airport. I do not think ANY amount of preperation is enough and will help that much, until it happens though. My younger child was really unsettled, he missed his cousins and auntie so much and his friends, he dislikes change and it was hard for him to settle. He was upset at night for many months.. For the first time when we went back too the UK at Xmas time, he actually was excited to come 'home' although loved being with his family and this is 3 yrs later. So this was a suprise and whilst he has now settled, he STILL talks about the UK and feels like that it his real 'home' My middle child loves it here, but has said after the 3 yrs she misses my sister and their cousins and they all say it would be perfect here, if she lived here too. My eldest hated it here. he hated his school and the lifestyle. He is not an outdoor child, hates the beach and was at an awkward age. I worried about him. But since starting Uni things have changed. He tells me he finally gets it, why we moved and whilst still hates the sun, he does love the country and uni, he likes his lifestyle much more now he has spent time with older friends and in the city and feels that life is getting better for him. he no longer wants to return to the UK ..... finally!! It has been a rollercoaster for my kids and they had instant friends, my best friend lives here and has done for 23 yrs now, her kids are all similar ages to my older kids and the middle two have become best friends with her two, they are always together at school and home, so that helped with settling. yet it was still very hard for them. they have all said though in a recent discussion, if their auntie, uncle and cousins moved here, life here would be the perfect life.... they were very close to my sister and cousins... I too wish my sister would move here...:cry: Edited July 17, 2012 by fairystar32 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Ptp113 Posted July 17, 2012 Share Posted July 17, 2012 (edited) Our older children were 14, 12 and 9 when we moved. (youngest was a baby)We sat down as a family and discussed moving. We discussed it meant leaving family and freinds behind and we would come back as much as we could too visit. We asked them many times on the few months we had too move and we were all in agreement, I even asked my eldest in the taxi on the way to the airport. I do not think ANY amount of preperation is enough and will help that much, until it happens though. My younger child was really unsettled, he missed his cousins and auntie so much and his friends, he dislikes change and it was hard for him to settle. He was upset at night for many months.. For the first time when we went back too the UK at Xmas time, he actually was excited to come 'home' although loved being with his family and this is 3 yrs later. So this was a suprise and whilst he has now settled, he STILL talks about the UK and feels like that it his real 'home' My middle child loves it here, but has said after the 3 yrs she misses my sister and their cousins and they all say it would be perfect here, if she lived here too. My eldest hated it here. he hated his school and the lifestyle. He is not an outdoor child, hates the beach and was at an awkward age. I worried about him. But since starting Uni things have changed. He tells me he finally gets it, why we moved and whilst still hates the sun, he does love the country and uni, he likes his lifestyle much more now he has spent time with older friends and in the city and feels that life is getting better for him. he no longer wants to return to the UK ..... finally!! It has been a rollercoaster for my kids and they had instant friends, my best friend lives here and has done for 23 yrs now, her kids are all similar ages to my older kids and the middle two have become best friends with her two, they are always together at school and home, so that helped with settling. yet it was still very hard for them. they have all said though in a recent discussion, if their auntie, uncle and cousins moved here, life here would be the perfect life.... they were very close to my sister and cousins... I too wish my sister would move here...:cry: You are one of the few that understands. As you say it takes years to 'get it', yet so many give up in weeks. Edited July 17, 2012 by Harpodom stop pommy bashing, you PB Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Guest63690 Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 Our older children were 14, 12 and 9 when we moved. (youngest was a baby)We sat down as a family and discussed moving. We discussed it meant leaving family and freinds behind and we would come back as much as we could too visit. We asked them many times on the few months we had too move and we were all in agreement, I even asked my eldest in the taxi on the way to the airport. I do not think ANY amount of preperation is enough and will help that much, until it happens though. My younger child was really unsettled, he missed his cousins and auntie so much and his friends, he dislikes change and it was hard for him to settle. He was upset at night for many months.. For the first time when we went back too the UK at Xmas time, he actually was excited to come 'home' although loved being with his family and this is 3 yrs later. So this was a suprise and whilst he has now settled, he STILL talks about the UK and feels like that it his real 'home' My middle child loves it here, but has said after the 3 yrs she misses my sister and their cousins and they all say it would be perfect here, if she lived here too. My eldest hated it here. he hated his school and the lifestyle. He is not an outdoor child, hates the beach and was at an awkward age. I worried about him. But since starting Uni things have changed. He tells me he finally gets it, why we moved and whilst still hates the sun, he does love the country and uni, he likes his lifestyle much more now he has spent time with older friends and in the city and feels that life is getting better for him. he no longer wants to return to the UK ..... finally!! It has been a rollercoaster for my kids and they had instant friends, my best friend lives here and has done for 23 yrs now, her kids are all similar ages to my older kids and the middle two have become best friends with her two, they are always together at school and home, so that helped with settling. yet it was still very hard for them. they have all said though in a recent discussion, if their auntie, uncle and cousins moved here, life here would be the perfect life.... they were very close to my sister and cousins... I too wish my sister would move here...:cry: Fairystar, what an honest appraisal of your experiences. Your children can clearly express their feelings to you. And that is the point I have been trying to make. Not all children can, and not all kids 'get it', in the end. Some will always feel torn. I have read some posters say they never really felt oz was home. Some will come back 'home', to the UK, but will still feel torn, because they end up leaving their parents and their 'Australian home' behind. I am not saying there is an easy answer, I am just saying parents need to have their eyes wide open before they emigrate, to the possibility that their dream, might not be their childrens, and then deal with it openly and honestly if that turns out to be the case. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 18, 2012 Share Posted July 18, 2012 (edited) I am not saying there is an easy answer, I am just saying parents need to have their eyes wide open before they emigrate, to the possibility that their dream, might not be their childrens, and then deal with it openly and honestly if that turns out to be the case.. I think it's a thing parents are aware of when migrating. Often as the older children get to comprehending it all, the harder it can be. I also think how close or reliant you are on family or friends can have an impact (thinking of fairystar saying about her kids missing their cousins). It's kind of stating the obvious to me as a parent anyways. Our sons future and well being has been at the forefront of our minds when deciding to up sticks to Aus. It's not a decision he ultimately has a say in as he is 4 but please don't think we've not thought about the future in Aus and what it might entail or how it might impact on him and us. Edited July 18, 2012 by Guest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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